As you may or may not know, I'm getting married in under three months now! Crazy how time flies by!
Through the whole wedding planning process, I like to think I've been rather chill. Sure I've had a few moments of madness (I'm currently going through an internal battle deciding on whether I really want to fork out - pun intended - extra money for the rose gold cutlery (It's just sooo pretty!!)), but for the most part, I've been pretty relaxed and laid back.
Wedding planning is only as stressful as you make it, and from the very beginning I was determined to have fun with it, always making sure I never lost sight of the bigger picture and what the day is really about. I get to marry my best friend. My fave person. The one who makes me laugh and smile and who can turn even the most mundane, boring moments into something special and memorable #sorryforthesoppyness
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, I haven't had any big worries or hesitations about this whole "getting married thing" ... except...for one small part of it that's been playing on my mind from the start and that I still haven't quite resolved yet.
The question of the name change...
For some people it seems it's not a big deal at all, and they look forward with excitement to switching to their husbands name, but for others it's a different story, and I (quite annoyingly because I still can't decide what I want to do!) fall into that boat.
Here's the thing - I like my name. I've had it for 27 years and it's me!
It's unique (I've never met someone with the same name as me and if you google it I'm the only one that comes up). Also (this is the silliest of reasons), my name starts with A, and through the years I've become accustomed to always being at the very top of the list. A silly, immature part of me likes being number one, haha!
Silly reasons aside, the main thing is that my name is a big part of my identity, and I'm not sure how happy I am to give that up!
So Lauren - just keep your name!
... but it's not that simple!
I actually really love the idea of Tom and I having the same name and being our own little family together. There's something nice about having the same name as your husband/wife.
I also actually really like Tom's name. If it was really common or weird, my decision would be simple, but I do like it, so I'm in a bit of a conundrum.
Hyphenating? Combining Names?
I very briefly flirted with the idea of hyphenating, but my name is long enough as it is without tacking another one on the end, so it's not something I'm keen on! (Anyone remember back in school, filling out those multiple choice forms where you had to colour in the little circle letters of your name? That used to take me forever!)
I've also heard of people combining two names together to make a whole new name. While we've had fun coming up with combos, it's never been something I've taken seriously. Our names just don't combine that well, although some of the options have been quite comical. We're actually using one of the combos as our wedding hashtag though - #AlberCleeryInLove - so maybe "AlberCleery" can be our unofficial surname. It sounds silly at first, but the more I say it, the more normal it sounds really! :p
Tom isn't fussed about what I do, although he does think it would be nice if we had the same name (and no, he is not keen on changing his name to mine unfortunately, despite the fact I've suggested this multiple times! Grrrrrrr at society's ingrained traditions!)
To be honest, even if I do decide to change I probably won't get around to doing it for a while, (think about all the paperwork!!) but I do want to have the same name as my future kids (that's probably the most compelling reason for me to change my name really).
For now though, I'm still undecided. I'm leaning towards taking Tom's name and also keeping my name as a middle name. I'd keep my name for work too, so technically I'd still be keeping my name in some capacity.
Anyway, that's enough rambling for now. It's not something I'm losing sleep over but definitely something to think about. I just wanted to put my thoughts out there and would love to hear your opinion on this?
Would you/have you changed your name and was it a big deal for you or a non-issue?
Lots of Love